Slave HornyChastityToy

It was time for another playtime with Mistress Athena today. At exactly 19:00 she ordered me to pack my 4 blocks of candles, a lighter, my collar, my mask, my gag, my marker, the framed picture of her and my vibrator. After that Mistress Athena told me to go deep into a forest, where no one can see or hear me. It took some time to find the perfect spot. Unfortunately it was cold, wet, rainy and windy, but it didn't matter to me, because I had a command from Mistress Athena. It was too windy at the first spot, so I had to find another spot. I was already completely naked and found a better spot after 5 or 10 minutes. I set up the candles, got on my knees and put on the collar and mask. After I thanked Mistress Athena, I put in my gag and counted slowly to 500 while being completely still. I wasn't even scared for a second that someone could find me, in my mind I had to film the perfect video for Mistress Athena. Afterwards I got my vibrator out and was given the privilege of a ruined orgasm. I think it only took me like 30 seconds to get to that point. I mean it's been 5 weeks in chastity and the only reliefs I earned were ruined orgasms so far, but at this point I might even like them more than normal orgasms. After my mess I thanked Mistress Athena again and got back home. I don't know what else to say, I've been looking for someone like Mistress Athena for years, she completely understands what I need and what I deserve. Even her punishments are so perfect, it's the perfect amount of pain (in most cases) for me to learn my lesson and try harder next time. I can't wait what comes next.

33 days of being locked up by Mistress Athena and I think I have gotten to a point where I accept it. I don't deserve real orgasms, I probably don't even deserve pleasure, I deserve to be locked up and completely desperate and horny for Mistress Athena, that way I can serve her the best. I mean don't get me wrong, I'd love to take off the cage and stroke it again, but there is still a long way until that, maybe it will never happen again, only Mistress Athena knows. Unfortunately I'm going to a vacation in a month and I need to take off the cage for a few minutes, but I don't think it will be a problem, because in my mind it's still there for the time. I'm still so happy and proud to serve Mistress Athena, I'd recommend her to anyone who wants to explore the best dynamic in their life. Everything just makes sense now, the cage, my pain and the rituals, I can't live without it. For years I had the habbit masturbating before I go to sleep and it completely changed. Now I can't sleep before falling to my knees, recording the video for Mistress Athena and wishing her good night. Thinking about her almost every single second of the day, I really hope she never lets me go, I am nothing without her anymore.

As a celebration of being locked up for 30 days Mistress Athena decided to start a chastity challenge for another 30 days without unlocking me of course. I know how desperate and frustrated I currently am and I have no idea how to get through another 30 days, but I trust Mistress Athena to guide me through it. My personal best before this was 2 weeks and we doubled that, so I guess it's not that hard to double that time again. I'm also glad that I hit the worship button 500 times in the last 30 days. That's like 125 per week and my goal is to keep that or maybe even improve it, because Mistress Athena only deserves the absolute best. I don't really know how to word it, but I can't imagine a life without Mistress Athena anymore, this dynamic gives me so much. I'm so glad I didn't give up, after being disappointed for so long I finally found the one.

Tomorrow marks my first 30 days of consecutive chastiy in my life. Yesterday Mistress Athena told me that I may get unlocked on christmas this year so there is no room for mistakes anymore, I don't want her to change it to next year. I don't even know how it feels to stroke my cock anymore and it doesn't matter. I also enjoy vibrating my cage for her, it probably makes much more sense. We also had our sheduled playtime for the week and I don't know where to start. Let's just say it was really painful but it is so worth to do it for Mistress Athena. I'm not even thinking about most of the things she assigns me to do, I just do it. One task was really painful and I had to overcome my fear a little bit, but giving up was no choice. And in the end something incredible happened, I landed on the 0,1% chance of getting to cum for her. Of course I decided I only deserve a ruined orgasm again, so I can stay desperate for Mistress Athena and I couldn't even hold it a minute. I'm kinda wondering why she is not making me eat my mess, but she knows probably better. I think after almost 30 days I can say it, I never want to be anywhere else again and I really mean it. I want to serve Mistress Athena for the rest of my life and I will do everything to make her happy. She is the most important person in my life and I can't wait to continue this dynamic until she decides otherwise, because I ain't be leaving.

This weekend will be the hardest one by far. I'm so desperate and horny after 27 days in my cage I would literally do anything do be allowed some pleasure and I mean everything. It has gotten to the point where I wake up at night because I'm so hard but the cage doesn't allow it of course. Afterall I understand why I need to be this horny and desperate for Mistress Athena. I think it has been proven the more desperate I get the better I can serve Mistress Athena. I don't know what I did to deserve this, but I appreciate her time and efforts so much. I just want to be her perfect toy no matter what it takes. At this point I'm always trying my absolut best with every task she assigns me. I'm really curious what my life will be in like a month, because right now there is nothing else I want to do or even think off. I kinda wish I could do more for Mistress Athena, I mean I don't know what exactly, but I really want to feel like a slave if that makes sense. I need to be careful how I type it out, because I don't want to challenge her (learned that the hard way), but in my dreams I come home from work, get naked, on my knees and then tied up maybe even with my time locks so I can't do anything about it until Mistress Athena decides otherwise or she allows me to go to sleep. Maybe that would be a little bit too much, I'm probably too desperate to think straight. Really looking forward to my next playtime with Mistress Athena on Sunday, the last time was definetly like the best experiences I've ever had.

Today I figured out I'm probably not gonna get out of my chastity cage this year and it makes so much sense. Don't get me wrong, I would literally do anything to get out and feel it again, but that's not my choice anymore, it's not even my cock anymore, it belongs to Mistress Athena. My whole body belongs to her now. On Monday she was really pushing my limits for squirming like a worm and although I teared up a little bit, I knew I deserved it. I still feel so secure with Mistress Athena. She is so good in her profession, every ritual, every task and every message wraps me more around her finger. It's only been 3,5 weeks so far but I would do anything for her. I'm not even questioning the tasks or commands anymore, when Mistress Athena assigns me something I drop everything and do it for her. Oh and what I also learned is never challenging her again in my diary, that was a painful, but well deserved, lesson. Looking forward to Monday, because Monday marks the day I've been locked up for 30 days, my first whole month and many more to come. Thank you Mistress Athena ♥

Today was intense. We moved our weekly play time to today and I don't know where to start. Mistress Athena gave me some instructions to tie me up, gag me, blindfold me and tie my vibrator to my cage and then she started a live call with me. I've never tried this feature before on this site, but it worked pretty well I think. Couldn't see anything but my Mistress saw me and I could understand her clearly. After the call started she gave me instructions on what to do with the vibrator. We slowly started with a low setting and it got more intense over time. It was very hard of me to not move and if there is a next time I need to tie me up better. But it felt soooooo good, I can't describe the feeling after 23 days of being locked up. Of course I wasn't allowed to cum (yet) and it got more intense over time. After some squirming and begging the beautiful Mistress Athena decided it's time to me to cum, that was maybe 20-30 minutes in our session and I was so close a few times. Unfortunately I wasn't able to cum in the end, I don't know exactly why, maybe I was too stressed or the 20 minutes of vibration were too much for me. And trust me, I really wanted to cum, but it was not possible. Mistress Athena knew it was not gonna happen and made me untie and ungag myself. At the end I was thanking her properly and we ended our session. That was probably one of the best things I've ever experienced even with the unfortunate ending.

3 weeks locked in chastity for Mistress Athena. I've never thought I could endure it for so long, but for Mistress Athena it just makes sense. I know I already wrote it last time, but she is literally perfect. It feels like her tasks and demands are progressively getting harder and it's exactly what I need. Yesterday was the first time I really made a mistake and she was generous enough to let me choose my penalty out of 2 options, I chose the easier option for me. I was thinking about it last night, I was kinda hoping she refuses it and still make me do the other penalty. Maybe it will happen after Mistress Athena read this. Other than that, I need to learn a lot. I'm still thinking about having an orgasm every day, maybe not even an orgasm, but having pleasure. I hope at some point I get my pleasure from serving her and don't think about having an orgasm anymore. I trust Mistress Athena fully and am looking forward to get to that point. I just want to be the perfect toy for her no matter what it takes.

Mistress Athena is perfect. She gets me more desperate every day and sometimes it's unbearable but I keep telling myself I don't have a choice anymore. She owns my body, my pleasure, even my thoughts. I don't want to be anywhere else anymore. I've never thought I could find someone like this. Everything is so worth and just makes sense, every bit of pain, every attention, every vibration gets me closer to become her perfect toy. I can't wait for the day I stop thinking and only obey, no matter what it is. And if that means I will never have a real orgasm again, I'm willing to take that sacrifice. I only exist to serve Mistress Athena. I don't deserve pleasure or even an orgasm as long as I'm still thinking about it. 

The last few days has been amazing as always with Mistress Athena. Yesterday we had our second "play time" and it was really humiliating, but it's not like it was bad, I was so desperate I didn't even care what I had to do to please her, didn't really think about it and just served Mistress Athena. She almost kept me in my chastity cage for 2 weeks now with no release in sight. She honestly should keep me in my cage forever, because the more desperate I get the better I server her. I also really enjoy just talking to her, the way she types is somehow so hypnotizing, I don't know how to explain it. I don't want to be anywhere else anymore, I might have finally found the perfect Mistress. Can't wait to give up more and more control until Mistress Athena is the only thing in my head.

I know it's only been a few days, but I may have finally found the perfect Mistress for me. Mistress Athena is genuinely perfect, at least for me. She keeps me busy quite a while every day, watches every single of my steps and punishes me if I do something slightly wrong. All of this while getting more and more desperate for her. And that's the best part, I think she understands that I need to be kept in chastity so I can serve her better. One of my dreams always was to be kept in chastity so long I don't even expect a release, maybe Mistress Athena can make that possible. But that all depends on if she wants to continue the ownership after the 7 days ended. I'm definetly trying the best I can to serve her.

Yesterday I came back from a little vacation and while in my vacation I decided I want to serve MistressAthena. We talked like 2 weeks ago and everything sounded so interesting, but I knew I was going on a vacation so I had to wait. The last few days I couldn't stop thinking about it and yesterday I finally signed my first Ownership Contract. I am her new toy now. It is amazing, I have so many responsibilities and penalties if I do something wrong. It kinda feels she exactly now what I need, even tho we have barely talked before. I'm really looking forward to the next 7 days and I can't wait to experience all of this and give up more and more control over time. 

Currently my fifth day in chastity with MistressDiamond and it has been way better than expected. Unfortunately I only bought the 7 day chastity challenge, but I hope she just decides that I have to stay in chastity for longer, basically as long as she wants. I'm also pretty curious about the Blackmail Service she offers, I've always wanted to try it with someone I trust. I really enjoy serving her and I'm doing everything in my power to satisfy her.

Finally locked up again, have been thinking more and more about the fact that I should stay in chastity all the time because I just masturbate so much when I'm bored or go to sleep and this cannot be good for me. 

locked myself up in my chastity cage before I went to sleep and also submitted my first chastity log. I definitely need to be locked up because I have masturbated a lot lately and that's not a right that I should have as a slave.