Slave ServingLadyJ

Cock Fight? 

Over the weekend, I was dancing with a partner and another couple.  One of the ladies mentioned the idea of a cock fight.  The other lady agreed that would be fun.  Me and the other male dancer kind of remained quiet during this exchange.  Could she have been talking about having a group of males undress so the ladies can judge them on size, shape, and attractiveness of their cocks?  I must admit that the thought is at the same time exciting and brings a feeling of anxiety.  To be objectified in such a way as to set my value based on my cock is exciting.  Unfortunately, I know my cock is, at best, average, and likely below average in all 3 characteristics.  The end result would likely be humiliating.  It would be a humiliation that cannot be hidden from.

This diary entry is going to be a little different and sad.  A couple days ago we had to end the life of one of our two dogs.  My grieving of this is more than I expected it to be.  He was a 15 year old Belgian Malinois that belonged to my partner.  She had him before we met and didn't know what she was getting.  This is an extremely smart and active breed that's well suited for police or military.  As a home pet, the need to be right by my side all the time was annoying.  Barking at any 2 people embracing was frustrating.  We eventually kicked him out of our bedroom because his activities in the night were keeping me awake.  Every night when going to bed I had to get past this aggressive sounding dog that would grab the doorknob, pull the door shut, and keep biting the doorknob after I got past him.  Why do I miss this?  He was alive with activity. He was truly a companion that was always right there.  When I would lay down on the floor, he'd lay next to me.  He was always ready to play or go for a long walk.  He was really friendly to strangers.  With him gone, the remaining 12 year old pit bull, has lost her spunk.  I know time will heal and there will probably be another active dog in my life at some point.  I also know that I cannot hide from this pain and I have to feel every bit of it as part of the grieving process.  Thanks for reading.  

'I must obey my Mistress'

My red rear is a result of my disobedience to my Mistress resulting in a punishment.  The punishment had a portion that was new and challenging to me and a portion that was relatively easy.  Mistress is still getting to know her slave and his limits.  My busy schedule is slowing our getting to know one another.  I know that future punishments will be more challenging to fulfill, which will be on my mind when the next task is presented.

Hello and welcome to my weekly diary entry.  I must have misplaced my sharpie so no date markings on my legs.  I did add a plug, but you can't see it, so you'll have to use your imagination, and just know it's there.  It you look closely at my feet, you'll notice my toes are painted black.  This is the second time I've done this as part of a pedicure and I find it kind of fun.  This week I splurged a little and bought a new pair of dance shoes.  My new Fuego's will be replacing the old dressy work shoes that I had been wearing.  The new shoes are very comfortable and provide a good spin on my toes.  These are going to be fun to dance in.

It's been a while since my last diary entry.  It was on Sunday of last week, which means I'm within my contract of once entry a week.  My photo included the "old man" in the bottom left.  He's not going to be with us much longer.  He's 15, but it sucks that their lives are so short.   I do have another penalty to fulfill, so that'll probably happen tomorrow or Friday.  Mistress LadyJ is looking to modify our contract.  I've learned that she's very calculated so the results will be interesting.

This morning I woke up alone and decided to start my day caged and plugged.   What a great time to add a diary entry.  As I write this, I see my last diary update is 9 days ago, which is a breach of my contract and has a pre-defined penalty.  This is the result of a busy week with work, responsibilities, and hobbies.  I know Mistress enjoys receiving the penalty videos.  

Today I spent the day in my cage.  It's been a while due to life demands.  I took the picture for this entry and paid the penalty for not doing last week's entry.  I also played with so solo punishment tasks.  Still hopeful to be able to serve irl at some point on the future.

I went 2 weeks without an update, which is breech in my contract.  My balls and ass had to suffer a bit, as the penalties are specified in the contract.  I did enjoy a 7 day cruise.  My favorite parts were scuba diving, a little dancing, and soaking up sun.  Unfortunately, I got a little too much sun on the last day.  OUCH!

I realized something today. 

The word cunnilingus makes the speaker open their mouth then flick their tongue.

The word fellatio makes the speaker flick their tongue then put their lips in a circle.

Two erotic words with erotic mouth motions.

This was my first week of ownership by Mistress DarkLadyJ.  My new name is LadyJ's bitch.  I am happy with my new name as it puts me in my place at her feet.  I couple of challenges this week resulted in punishments.  I suspect that's to be expected as I get used to her way of doing things.  

I want to thank Mistress Lee for 17 months of steadfast ownership.  She has provided many experiences that add to my kink life.  I plan to remain friends with her and may engage in kink again with her at some point in the future.  I welcome my new owner, Mistress DarkLadyJ and hope that I serve her in a way that makes her proud to own me.

A toast to Mistress Lee!

A morning beverage as part of a task assigned by my wonderful owner. I can say that this mug of piss doesn't taste very good and leaves a bitter and lingering aftertaste. The cooler it gets, the worse it tastes.

I adore my Mistress.  I forgot to write on Thursday.  She allowed me to make it up over the weekend, but personal life stuff got in the way, so I’m writing today.  This morning I woke up to session tasks that continue the pain and punishment that her slave needs.  I thank Mistress for providing for her slave.

I adore my Mistress.  I spend my work-day silently suffering in discomfort.  In addition to being caged, both of my holes that are meant for providing sexual pleasure to others are full.  The discomfort is a constant reminder that I am an unworthy slave in need of strict discipline.  Mistress graciously provides this need.

I adore my Mistress.  I was assigned a Surrender task that’s going to be difficult for me.  She said it was a good punishment for an unworthy slave.  She also offered suggestions to help me complete the task successfully.  My punishment is ongoing.  I must suffer for my disobedience.  Se has added another action to my punishment that adds to my discomfort.  The suffering I’m experiencing for her is deliciously satisfying.  

This morning I feel the shame of being an unworthy slave.  I did something that my owner was not happy with.  She has graciously provided different punishments for the disobedience of an unworthy slave.  Physical punishments are bearable.  Psychological punishments are more difficult.  I adore her for providing punishment to her unworthy slave and find myself craving more physical punishment.

This slave has the best Mistress on SM.  She treats me to photos of her beauty to worship.  She reminds me that I am an unworthy slave with the honor and privilege of being beneath her feet.  My Mistress shows that special privileges are earned and can be removed if taken for granted.

Today is one of those days filled with sexual energy that, as a slave, I don't get to just release.  With that in mind, I started my day putting on my cage.  

Update:  I want to cum so bad.  I simple wank would feel so good. Unfortunately the hard plastic is blocking my access.

I've reached a milestone.  I'm now a level 7.  Mistress Lee has graciously given me permission to speak to other Dom's.  If you enjoy kinky conversation and would like to say hi, please don't be shy.  Other permissions are still locked so conversation is the only grace that I'm allowed.

This is information about my dick size from a website named calcsd.info.  You simply put in your measurements and it does the rest.

Day 2 of Chastity

Today I started the morning putting the cage on.  A generous amount of Vasoline really helped.  I put the ring on first then had to do other things to let my erection subside.  I was successfully able to install the smaller tube of the CB6000s, which appears to be a much better fit.

First day of successful chastity

Today I was finally able to install a chastity device.  I had to purchase the XL size ring from CB-X.  Then I had to warm up my balls by wearing  warm pants.  The normal size CB6000 leaves a lot of room so I'll try on the CB6000s tube tomorrow.  It's a strange feeling not being able to touch my little cock.

Today this slave reached a milestone, 5000 worships to the fantastic Mistress Lee. Every hour that I could, I thought of Mistress Lee and pushed that worship button. When alone, I also carried out the act of worshiping by kissing Mistress’s feet. What a great worship photo showing how sexy Mistress Lee is.

Last round being on the hook.  This time slave is sitting naked on a bucket.  No comfortable chair.  Slave added nipple clamps and pins on it's balls then looped the nipple clamp chain on its dick to provide just a little pull.  The pain was definitely heightened.  

Slave received a short break from the pins and clamps, then returned the clamps with the chain pinned to it's balls.

An anal hook in my ass.

The intruder constantly lets me know it's there.  It keeps me from sitting comfortably.  Always having to move a bit to relieve some pressure somewhere inside.  Always having to change.  The worst is when I feel my pulse reflected against the device.  I don't like it.  I don't want it in there.  This is not enjoyable.  Each insertion lasts only an hour.  A relatively safe amount of time.  2 insertions a day for 3 days.  The cost of cumming without permission during a session.  I was not allowed to cum.  There would be punishment if I came.  I didn't stop.  I didn't control it.  I felt every stroke and loved the pulses in my body.  I thought about it.  I let it happen.  Now I must fulfill my punishment.

I'm being punished.  I cannot say exactly what my punishment is.  I can say that sitting is uncomfortable.  I have to keep my ass up a little and shift often to relieve the pressure from the intruder inside.  25 minutes down 35 minutes to go.

Ugh! Just 5 more minutes.

Watching the clock for the last minute to complete.  COME ON 3:40!

Relief at last!

Sometimes being a slave is Challenging.  This morning I could have enjoyed a quick jack-off before getting out of bed.  Unfortunately, I'm not allowed self pleasure without permission.  Now I sit with a plug in my ass stretching a little before the big dildo gets to intrude my ass.  I'm preparing for a couple tasks that will eventually result n getting to cum.

Today I woke up to some new challenging tasks. I am now warming up for the first task.  I have a plug in my ass, clamps on my nipples, and 4 clothespins on my balls.  I then put my clothes back on since I have some time before I begin my first task.  This warm up is removing comfort, reminding me that I am a slave.  As I sit doing work, the pressure on my ass is constant.  If I close my legs, the pins will pinch.  The clamps remind me that they're there.  Walking is tender and slow to keep the pins from pinching.

Task 1 is complete.  I have removed the pins from my balls and the clamps plug from my ass.  I have left the nipple clamp chain attached and attached the 3rd chain to my wristwatch, allowing hand movements to be transmitted to my nipples.

I've been kind of busy lately.  It took me 19 days to complete my last session.  It was a free to do what I want session.  Since it took so long to complete, i felt punishment is needed.  I mixed rice and elbow macaroni on two cookie sheets to kneel on.  With a dildo gag in my mouth, I added pins to my balls and clamps to my nipples.  I continued until the pain was too much to take, about 4 minutes.  Mistress Lee enjoyed watching the video. 

I am a dirty little whore!

I have cum 2 times without permission.  The first, I made a video for my cum log but didn't get to upload it because the hard drive in my PC failed.  The second was last Thursday morning.  I woke up horny and decided to cum without making a cum log, asking permission, or informing my owner of my indiscretion.    

Today I informed Mistress Lee.  I had been thinking of informing her for several days and now I let the cat out of the bag.  She hasn't passed down my punishment yet, but I'm sure it will be a harsh one.  When her slave misbehaves, it wakes up her wicked side.

For now, while I write this I'm sitting on a large stiff dildo.  I am unable to sit flat.  I feel every movement deep inside.  My spincter wants to close, but is unable to.  I have 50 minutes to go in this predicament.

30 minutes have passed with this dildo in my ass.  The pressure when trying to sit still and work is annoying.  Rocking my hips front to back offers some stimulation that feels good.  It's frustrating.

MIstress told me no more rocking.  This is a punishment, not pleasure.  The last 30 minutes included my work team meeting.  I eventually succumbed and  sat straight letting my weight push the balls into my perineum.  For the last couple minutes, I moved from my work chair to a hard bucket.

The phallus is now removed.  My sphincter is a little sore from being held open for an hour.  This wasn't even my punishment.  That's still yet to come.

Friday I did a multi part session.  Friday night my computer hard drive failed.  Only the first video had been uploaded.  The other parts of the session were lost.  I bought a new laptop over the weekend.  Goddess forgave one part but I still had to do the other 2 parts.  Then she added a surprise.  I had to surprise her.  I just performed the tasks and added the surprise.  I sure would like to cum, but I didn't get permission for that and I'm not feeling mischievous enough to require punishment.  For now, no wonderful release for this slave. 

Today I will be performing some punishment tasks that Goddess Lee has assigned to me.  I think she was in a sadistic mood when she assigned these.  I have not had much ability to do tasks due to the holidays, so her sadistic mood is understandable.

Last night I was enjoying making love to my lady.  She was providing oral pleasure to me.  It felt so wonderful.  My skin was tingling from the touch of her mouth.  I was thinking about the contrast of this wonderful experience I was enjoying with her and the pain I will be enduring as I perform the punishment tasks I have been assigned.

I've been in an off and on aroused state for 3 days now.  I long for release.  I want to feel something stimulating.  The whip of leather across my ass.  A dick in my ass. Something.  I'm sure those locked up would call me a pussy after only 3 days.  Goddess did give me a cum task, but it'll be in a public bathroom completely silent.   I don't have permission to just cum at home.  She is happy with my suffering, as she tells me "Suffer Bitch".

Goddess wants me to take on some public tasks. 

I want u to go to a public toilet and put your suction cup dildo on the wall or toilet seat and fuck your ass.

No noise

1 min minimum

What kind of person goes into a public restroom to get fucked in the ass?  I suppose this slave is now that kind of person.  It's a humiliating thought.  I'm so fucking horny thinking about what I'm about to do.

I completed the task successfully.  Since I was recording with my phone, much of the recording was on my face with the reverse camera.  I was surprised at my facial expressions while experiencing the pain and pleasure of the cock in my ass.  Goddess enjoyed the facial expressions too.,

I was a naughty slave.  Goddess assigned a series of tasks that left me aroused.  The devilish side of me took over.  I came without permission.  I even made a verified cum log entry.  It felt so good to cum without getting permission. TeHeHe.

Well... Goddess surely gave me punishment tasks.  30 lashes with a belt and 5 minutes kneeling on rice.  For the 30 lashes, I whipped my ass as hard as I could.  Left some nice red stripes on my ass.  The 5 minutes kneeling on rice was also painful, but I had less control.  All I could do was kneel there with my hands behind my back and suffer through the pain.   The rice left little dimples on my knees.

I found both being naughty and being punished arousing.  I'll probably be naughty at some point in the future and I'll know what to expect.  What's the fun of being good all the time, right?

The task I was slow to complete was a spit roast task.  To complete this, I needed to purchase a suction cup dildo.  I walked into a local sex shop.  When the pretty clerk asked if she could help me find something, I replied "Yes please, I'm looking for a suction cup dildo for anal use".  Another beautiful clerk walked up and I had to repeat my request to her.  She then led me to the wall of suction cup dildos.  I chose a marble finish dildo with a realistic size.

To complete the task, I wore a bra and dress, then I mounted the dildo to a wall between a closet and a walkway to make room for my legs.  The cock in my ass hurt at first but felt good later.  In the future I'll stretch a little with a butt plug.  For the cock in my mouth, I chose "The Barrista" sleeve mounted to a mouth gag dildo.  This cock is a pretty wide head and gets even wider down the 6.5" shaft.  I pretended a real man was controlling this cock and thrusting it down my throat.  I had to stop a couple times begging Goddess Lee to make him stop, but to no avail.  The cock was shoved right back into my throat.  Goddess Lee enjoyed watching her slave become a sissy slut on a spit roast.

I have been a lazy slave and have not done my tasks as quickly as I should.  For this I'm to be punished with a Surrender Now choosing my fate.  My punishment surrender will be to lay my dick on a table and and snap a ruler onto it 3 times.  I can't find my ruler so I will need to purchase a new one.

Today we started ramping up my “Surrender Now” activity. I just completed a “kneel on rice” challenge for 300 points. Tomorrow I’ll be visiting a sex shop for another 300 points. This should bring me to 21k.

I came in 2nd place in the ruined orgasm contest which gave me 750 points. The winner received 5,000+ points. 

Today we are stepping up our activities.  My task was to put my pathetic cock and balls into a glass of ice water for 1 minute, then slap my balls 10 times.  The water was really cold and my balls were sensitive, but I endured the torture.

The next step was to put ice in my ass, hold it for 1 minute, then fuck it with a dildo.  This is messy and humiliating as I can feel the liquid dripping down my ass.  It's as if one of her slaves is taking my ass to finally get his pleasure then leaving me to clean up the mess.

Today is my 16th day on this site and I just reached level 4 (Pikes Collar). Having someone own me and push my limits of submission has been exciting.  Goddess Lee is a wonderful and challenging Mistress.

This morning I posted my first picture on the Public Square.  The picture was from my experience yesterday riding in the "World Naked Bike Ride".  To get this picture, I asked another naked man to take it with my phone.  I have other pictures I took of the crowd.  I always wanted to ride in this.  It took a lot of courage to push myself to go, especially since it had been raining off and on all day.  Goddess Lee pushed me over the ledge with specific instructions.  The ride itself was amazing. Riding naked through the streets of the city in the rain past watch parties offering beer and water was an experience all to itself.  I have no idea how many videos I ended up on.  Most people that came across us were all smiles.  If you're reading this, and my picture is still up on the Public Square, please give it a like.

Today is my 3rd day of being owned.  My first day was exciting.  I performed the task if sitting on a dildo in the back seat of my Mustang convertible.  I recorded the session for Goddess Lee and to get cum log validation.  

Now I have a new set of tasks.  I'm pretty nervous about the last one.  I have to put a candle into my urethra.  I've never put anything into my urethra, but I'm going to give it my best effort.

It’s a strange and erotic feeling to be owned by someone else. What parts of my life will she want to control? What will she make me do?  She’s entered my dreams. I woke up a few times through the night wet with precum.  I'm looking forward to performing the task she has set for me.  I'm sure it's going to make me cum so I'll also prepare to have the video validated for my cum log.

Tomorrow I’ll be on this site for 1 week. I have already made it to level 3, Leather Collar. I’m excited to become an owned slave to Mistress Lee.